I’ll teach you, you b****!
You know how it is...sometimes good luck can follow from bad, I guess it’s probably some cosmic balance thing, but a few weeks after the CB100N was written off, an MZ250TS became available for purchase. A friend of mine, Gary Slaughter, who taught me to ride motorcycle properly (Shame the learning didn’t stick!) used to own one, so when one appeared for sale near my home, it seemed like a good idea to go and buy it.
For those who don’t know, the MZ was an East German manufactured 249cc two-stroke single featuring 6v DC electrics, a 4½ gallon tank, an enclosed chain, a fuel consumption you’d only have if you had a moped, the ability to start the bike with a flat battery, plenty of storage for tools and two-stroke oil and a cush drive. The cush drive allows the rear wheel to be removed, leaving the chain and drive sprocket in place. There were downsides; the brakes were awful, 6V lights were OK but not brilliant, starting could be problematic (6V electrics again), a hard ride for the pillion because some of the aforementioned storage was in the pillion seat and the most diabolical brake light switch in the known universe!
So, I took ownership of the bike and it too did me sterling service, back and forth to Bournemouth with all my kit, cheap to run, fun to ride, can be ridden up trees! (Remember that, Ozzy?) But, being a two-stroke, it did, on occasion, foul up the plug; a hotter plug did help but if the measuring of the two-stroke oil was a bit off or the oil was not as good a quality as it should have been, the bike ran erratically or not at all. Well, it came to pass that little events conspired, as they do, to result in a bigger, expensive event. I was running late for something, it was a wet day, money was tight and the main tank had just emptied so I’d switched on to the reserve and…the bike wouldn’t start…and the blood began to boil! Kick, kick, kick! Nothing. Tried a little cold start setting. Nothing. (Blood is now getting up to temperature!) Tried the flat battery setting. Nothing but a little splutter. Tried bump-starting the bike. Nothing. Now I’m hot and as angry as ever; I do hate mechanical devices that don’t do what they should. Right! Check fuel, on. Check power, on battery. Cold start device, off. Kick once. Nothing. Kick again…a splutter! Kick a third time…the bike revs into life!
At this point, gentle beings, a sensible bloke would have been grateful but I was hot, bothered and angry and the bike had to be punished for letting me down so I revved it…hard, well into the red zone on the tacho and, well, you guessed it, it seized. Stopped, dead, nothing. Now, I know what some of you may be thinking, you’re thinking that I’m really going to lose it now and tear the bike apart with my bear hands but, strangely, I didn’t; at the point it seized an odd sense of calm and resignation seemed to settle over me and I locked the bike, walked to the bus and went to my local MZ dealer and got him to recover the bike and fix it.
Once repaired, the bike was even better than before and even more reliable, taking me and my love interest at the time to London and back and taking all my stuff from Bournemouth to Steyning on a number of occasions. It did let me down once after this, when the DC voltage regulator packed up, resulting in me owning a CB250N and leading to my next story, but the MZ lived on and eventually was used in an engine transplant when my mate, Tony, had the engine in his fail. Long live MZs! :)
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